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| Engagement
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Normally,
the engagement ceremony is conducted at the bride's place.
Engagement or Sakharpuda literally means 'a packet of
sugar' which is given to each other. It could be a simple
affair wherein the bridegroom and his close relatives come
to the bride's home. But it could also be organised by
bride's side on a larger scale inviting more guests.
The bride flanked by her parents and karvali i.e. bride's
sister sit in a row on pat - wooden board. The
bridegroom's mother applies haldi-kunku and gives a sari
to the bride into which bride is supposed to change.
Thereafter the bridegroom's mother does Oti Bharane and
gives Sakharpuda - a cone shaped decorative parcel filled
with pedhe. Giving gifts to the bride's parents and
karvali is optional. This means first, bridegroom's side
has to give their word to bride's side that they have
fixed the alliance. Similarly, to give their consent in
return, the bride's mother invites the bridegroom, his
parents and karvali to sit on the pat. She applies kumkum
tilak to the groom and his father and haldi-kunku to
groom's mother and karvali and gives a pant and shirt
piece or any clothing item as also Sakharpuda to the
groom. Again gifts to all others are optional. After this
ceremony, the bridegroom puts a ring on the bride's
ring-finger - anamika -of the left hand. The similar
process is repeated by the bride.
The guests are given pedhe, some refreshments or a full
meal. The engaged couple meets the guests and pays respect
to elders by touching their feet. This ceremony signifies
the agreement of the alliance witnessed by many people. |
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| Muhurt
Karane : |
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On
an auspicious day, months before the wedding day, both the
sides start wedding preparation. Traditionally, it is
called muhurt karane when at least five suvasini - married
women are invited. With iron pestle tied with mango
leaves, one by one suvasinsi pound halkund (dried kaccha
haldi) in iron mortar into fine haldi powder, which is
used during halad chadavane. Thereafter they roll out
papads and make sandage (soaked dals grinded with spices
are made into tiny balls and dried in the Sun). These
days, this tradition is given a go-by.
After muhurt, both the sides, especially, bride's side
goes on a shopping spree. The bride's side prepares for
rukhvat - an exhibition of gift articles, decorative
pieces, handicrafts, eatables such as five types - each of
dry fruits, fruits, ladoos, moramba, sweets etc. Actually
this is to convey bride's various skills but it goes
without saying that anyone can contribute to this
exhibition.
On an auspicious day, the first invitation is given to
Lord Ganesh by visiting his temple and then to other Gods.
Thereafter, invitations are given personally by parents or
uncle-aunts, or any relative as per the seniority of the
invitees. Typically, the ladies carry a silver kunku
karanda and silver bowl with akshata -coloured rice. The
inviting lady applies kunku to the lady of the house while
the inviting gentleman gives invitation cards topped with
akshata to the man of the house and both formally utter
the invitation. The inviting couple is given some sweets
or sugar to accept the invitation and the sweet news.
Because of distances and want of time, the invitations
could also sent out by the post or courier. |
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| Gadagner/
Kelvan : |
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The
bride's close relatives and friends call over the bride
and her family for a meal and give her a gift and do oti
bharane. The bridegroom's side do the same to the groom.
Two-three days prior to the wedding day, for gharacha
gadgner, close relatives are invited for a meal at the
bride's place where gharacha aher i.e. parents' and close
relatives' wedding gifts are given to the bride and
similar ceremony takes place at groom's side among his
folks. The parents formally give expensive clothes,
jewellery, silverware etc to the bride. |
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| Halad
Chadavane : |
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On
the day before the wedding day, haldi powder pounded on
the muhurt is made into a paste in a plate. One by one,
the five suvasini dip mango leaves - one in each hand - in
plate of haldi paste and apply it first on feet, then on
knees, then on shoulders and then on forehead of the
bride. Each suvasini does this three times. Thereafter,
the bride is given a nice massage of haldi paste depending
on her consent. Since these days the brides wear make-up
they do not like too much yellowness on the skin. Same
ceremony takes place at the groom's side. Often, ushti
halad i.e. haldi paste left over after applying it to the
groom, is taken to the bride's place and is applied to the
bride. The significance of haldi ceremony is that the
aspiring couple is not supposed to go out and expose
themselves. This may take place on the wedding day before
the ritual bath. |
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| Simant
Pujan : |
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Simant
literally means boundary. The groom and the marriage party
(barati) are welcomed at the boundary of the bride's
village and her mother does puja of the groom. These days,
it is done on the wedding day itself at the venue of
marriage. Bride's mother washes the groom's feet by
pouring a little water over his feet in a plate, does
kumkum tilak, puts akshata on groom's head, does arati and
gives some sweet or madhupak (mixture of honey and curd).
Groom's folks are also given sweets or madhupak. The groom
is made to sit in the venue and bride's father gives gifts
like suit, jewellery etc to the groom. Groom's mother and
ladies go to bride's quarter and give her five saris,
jewellery etc. |
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| Sankalp
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The
day before the wedding day, parents of the bride and the
groom in their respective places announce the marriage
that is witnessed by the priest. This ceremony may take
place on the wedding day itself. |
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